What can a parent do to help his/her teenager open up to him/her? Well, you could start with making your teenager know that once you were a teenager too! This can definitely be hard to picture for quite a number of teens. Especially, if they picture you barking out orders like a drill sergeant. If this is the case, you may want to try to change the way your teenager pictures you. You can still be an authoritative figure while letting your teenager see you eye to eye.

Sometimes it helps to let your teen picture you as human just the same. Sometimes the authoritative side of a parent shadows off how he/she is a human being who commits mistakes like the rest of us. As much as you would like to show your teenager a perfect example all the time, it wouldn’t hurt to let him/her know that you make mistakes yourself. Showing your own vulnerability can definitely make it easier for a teenager to open up to you.

You are no longer the drill sergeant but someone that they are looking at eye to eye. Talking about your teenage years wouldn’t hurt as well! In fact, many teens have found ways to connect to their parents once their parents shared common apprehensions that they once felt during adolescence. An experience that does not quite change, no matter if you were a teen 20 years ago or now is how a teenager deals with physical changes. Try and share your feelings about the physical changes you underwent during adolescence.

Hopefully, your teen will notice some common ground between you and open up him/herself about his/her own feelings about changes that are occurring or those that he/she may have already gone through.

In some cases, all your troubled teen needs is a supportive tug. If you have certain clues to what your teen may be experiencing, then it may be a good idea to show your support for him/her even before he/she has opened up completely about the issue. This may help your teenager feel more at ease, and then let you know more about what may really be going on in his/her head. Sometimes, the fastest way to drive a teen away is by intimidating him/her. If you want your teenager to open up to you, the last thing on your mind should be starting your approach with a rule to follow. These can come later on or at least at a time where you’re not after the openness of your child.

You can’t command openness. It is something that may be given. Like a butterfly fluttering by, if you chase it, it may fly away. But if left alone it may alight upon you on its own. Hone your patience.