1.  Lectures and clichés.

2.  Droning on, when you really mean to say just one thing.

3.  Putting a label on your teen.

4.  Speaking of the future negatively.

5.  Providing immediate answers to their problems.

6.  Placing them under the spotlight of interrogation about their restlessness.

7.  Non-acceptance of displays of individuality.

8.  Focusing on the negative.

Lectures and clichés

If you approach your teenager in a manner which sounds preachy, you may not get the response you are hoping for. More likely, you may be ignored, especially if you mention cliché remarks which your teenager is tired of hearing.

He may not want to listen to how you find him in contrast to yourself as a teenager or the son/daughter of so and so. This approach may just get him frustrated, which in turn can get you frustrated, and the situation may worsen. If you don’t try a different approach your troubled teenager may just decide on taking his troubles elsewhere.

Droning on, when you really mean to say just one thing

When you check up on your teenager, asking if he cleaned his room today, do you go straight to the point or do you find yourself going into a whole monologue? If so, you are probably pointing out a lot of negativity. Of course all this negativity can come off as a wall of criticism to face. Again, this type of approach can cause aggravation to stir within your child and with further trouble your parent-child bond can slowly deteriorate.

Putting a label on your teen

Adolescents particularly do not like being placed in a box. They feel the need to constantly express themselves and portray their individuality. When you place a label on your teen’s behavior, you restrict him in certain ways. If you call him “unproductive” long enough, he may just end up that way.

In ways, you may even be molding him to fit your negative comments/labels. Positive remarks which encourage further development rather than stifle growth are a better alternative. At least with these kinds of comments, you are sure that you are making room for growth and not containing your child.

Speaking of the future negatively

When you speak of your teenager’s future negatively, it is like you are presuming his downfall. You are definitely setting yourself up for rejection by your teen with these kinds of remarks.

Who wants to hear that they are going to fail at something even before they’ve started trying? Like in the manner of putting a label on your teen, he may also end up proving your comments true! As this happens, you may even feel compelled to speak more of the future negatively because of how your forecasts seem to be realities.