You may turn to outside Help to deal with your teenager

If worse comes to worse and you reach a point where you feel hopeless and exhausted, you may want to leave the disciplining of your teen to outside sources. You may seek outside help like a counselor, boarding school, or boot camp.

Initial relief will most likely be your first reaction upon finding an appropriate source of aid. After a significant period of conflict, there will be silence at home. But oftentimes, after this initial period, little by little your defiant teen may go back to his routine of unruly behavior. This may lead to your disappointment in him, and prompt you to seek even more outside help. But the chances that this process may become a vicious cycle are there.

The warmth in your parent-child relationship may decrease or even disappear

It will definitely be hard to appreciate your child once he has rubbed you the wrong way for quite some time. In spite of how much you love your teen and want to reach out to him even as he is pushing you away, part of you may be apprehensive of further rejection.

Your parental instincts may come in conflict with your natural human feelings of steering clear of negativity. Providing unconditional love for a defiant teen even when he is screaming in your face is quite an accomplishment.

The distance between you and your teen grows and grows.

Your adolescent can sense your exhaustion or disappointment. But even as you may have apprehensions and fears of rejection by your teen, they have their own as well. Your teen may be yearning for your warmth deep inside but may be just to scared or ashamed to show it.

Instead, they may turn to their peer group or even substance abuse instead. But the price to pay for acceptance is high, as they are prompted to engage in self-destructive behavior. The farther away from you he is, the more susceptible he becomes to serious issues such as depression and suicide.

There are two ways your teenager may go: he can go further down or steadily go up.

Signs of his spiraling down include the following:

1. Displaying immaturity in not taking responsibility for one’s actions while simultaneously pointing the finger at others for their own mistakes

2. Displaying immaturity through impulsive decision-making and in the abrupt loss of one’s temper.

3. Engaging one’s self in illegal acts/crimes and substance abuse (drugs or alcohol)

4. Experiencing problems with keeping a job and creating healthy social relations with co-workers.

All this may lead to the emergence of characteristics of antisocial personality disorder as he/she reaches 18 years old. Characteristics include: apathy, indifference towards the plight of others, problems with long-term relationships, and even causing others harm without being bothered. These traits may even get passed on to their own children.

On the other hand, many teens can also do a 360 degree turn and shape up by the time they near adulthood. The responsibility that comes with further independence can be enough to awaken one’s maturity in dealing with life.