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kkhadder
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need advice and help ASAP - 2008/06/30 03:04 We are looking at different possibilities for our daughter and are not sure what to do. She is at a hospital right now due to the fact that we cant control her and keep her completely safe. Cant get our work done and get anything done effectively. She has been in counseling for a year with a Christian counselor for behaviour issues…not doing what is expected of her, breaking the rules, lying etc. She got worse when she broke her leg in 3 places last year slipping on ice and had nothing to do….but the behavior has been there a long time. Went on antidepressant lexipro 10 mg a day. She got caught binge drinking in April. In May she went to ER due to constipation,(poor eating habits and bulemia) and she skipped school and went out with a boy from another school in May to eat lunch and then told us she was raped by a boy at her school in the beginning of April and that is why she skipped school to go with this boy from another school so she could have someone to talk to. We were not totally believing the rape story and 2 days later she took 70 aspirin and we took her to the ER because she wanted us to think she was raped… she was really sick from the pills and we then believed her due to the Over dose. She then went and got a pelvic and tested for disease. She talked with detectives and kept to her story. We took her out of school for the rest of the school year (30 days) so she would not be traumatized by the boy. The kid that raped her went in for a voluntary lie detector test and passed it with flying colors. He never touched her and she admitted she lied about the rape. She told us that she wished he would go to jail any way cuz she did not like him. Anyway, then we switched counselors as she lied to the counselor for 6 weeks about the rape and she believed her and it was a mess. Took her to a an LSW at OSU Harding Hospital. She had 6 sessions with her and they did diagnose her with oppositional defiant disorder, bulimia and eating disorders, emotional (depression) so far. The LSW kept trying to work with her about her irrational beliefs and her lying. On Thursday she went to counseling with her dad and on the way home they were discussing honesty and how important it is and at the same time she acted like she got text messages saying soccer practice was cancelled. We found out later it was not cancelled and she lied. She texted her dad that she did not want to play soccer but did not want to tell him. This made no sense as we never pushed her back into sports…when she broke her leg slipping on ice we did not push her at all. She said she wanted to play so we helped her get her leg back with a trainer. So my husband’s blood pressure (has had one heart attack a few years back) has been high and the stress level has been hard. We lock up all meds since the over dose… we have to keep her door open to her room. She cut herself with razor blades on the face and arm and she said she was going to kill herself and she was running away. I smacked her across the face….never had done that ever. Her and I don’t get a long at all we totally clash and I tend to talk down to her and yell at her…she is closer to dad but she really hurt him this last time. We took her to a psychiatric hospital for evaluation on Friday and she will be there for the next 4 days. At in take she said she did not want to die, she wanted to figure out her lying … etc. But she says this all the time and then things get worse. An LSW at the hospital said that EMDR treatments might really help her. Have heard from others that if she is dishonest and there is no trust than EMDR would not be helpful. We don’t know when to know if it’s the right decision to send her somewhere…. Or what to do for her...or where to send her...we looked at tons of schools on line but how to know what is good?
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tti_admin
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Re:need advice and help ASAP - 2008/07/03 15:33 Bulimia, eating disorders, depression, and self-harm, may all lead to thoughts of suicide. Of course at the start, the intensity of emotions and weight of the issues your daughter is dealing with inside are not this heavy. They may have started with personal issues such as self-worth or self-image and have grown from there. Self-image issues may very easily sprout into eating disorders such as Bulimia. When the eating disorder progresses and her control over the disorder disappears, this may normally lead into the depression. As the depression overcomes her, her impulsive actions become harder to control. She can begin to feel pulses of deep emotional pain that can make her want to cross normal barriers that we set up for ourselves.She may begin to struggle with self-harm. And when the highs that a troubled teenager may get from cutting are no longer enough, that is when she searches for more, a deeper physical hurt that could temporarily mask the intense emotional pain from within. That is when ideas of suicide come into the picture. The fact that you have been offering your daughter the counseling, medication, and professional help that a teenager suffering from mental problems needs, is a good step. But because you have already observed her response to this help and recognize the need for more, searching for an alternative may be the answer. From your description, it appears that her constant lying has become a difficult hurdle for you and her own progression into healing. This may be a definite sign that she is in need of a change of scenery, but when you do look for a school or program for her it would be a good idea to choose one which is easily accesible to you, because family or parental involvement in the healing process can be very helpful in treatment.

Post edited by: tti_admin, at: 2008/07/03 15:34
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Boardwalk :: Forum List Boarding Schools, Boot Camps, Wilderness Programs When is enough enough?

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